Let’s face it, when you think about Valentine’s Day, everyone gets romantic and tries to find a way to tell that special someone they are loved. There have been some great poets and romance writers in our history. Today I want to bring you the story of Elizabeth Barrett and English poet Robert Browning.
Elizabeth Barrett was born in to a wealthy and very well-known family. Elizabeth was a poet, however she was disabled and lived in her father’s house. It was known that her father was a very domineering and controlling man. One day a friend of Robert Browning introduced him to Elizabeth, which he had known about through reading her poetry in 1845. When they met, despite her disability of not being able to walk, they fell in love. Elizabeth’s father did not like Robert because he thought he was only dating her for the family inheritance. Elizabeth and Robert dated secretly and wrote each other love letters. In 1846, hundreds of letters later, they eloped. The sad part of this love relationship was that her father disowned her and her brothers did as well because they felt he was just after their money. Elizabeth was in love and she did not let her family disowning her affect her relationship with Robert. Elizabeth and Robert eventually moved to Italy where they had a son in 1849.
She remained in Italy with her husband and published Sonnets from the Portuguese from 1845–1846 and published first during 1850. “This is a collection of 44 love sonnets written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning.” Read there here .
I love your verses with all my heart, dear Miss Barrett,-and this is no off-hand complimentary letter that I shall write,-whatever else, no prompt matter-of-course recognition of your genius and there a graceful and natural end of the thing: since the day last week when I first read your poems, I quite laugh to remember how I have been turning and turning again in my mind what I should be able to tell you of their effect upon me-for in the first flush of delight I thought I would this once get out of my habit of purely passive enjoyment, when I do really enjoy, and thoroughly justify my admiration-perhaps even, as a loyal fellow-craftsman should, try and find fault and do you some little good to be proud of hereafter!-but nothing comes of it all-so into me has it gone, and part of me has it become, this great living poetry of yours, not a flower of which but took root and grew .. oh, how different that is from lying to be dried and pressed flat and prized highly and put in a book with a proper account at top and bottom, and shut up and put away .. and the book called a “Flora,” besides! After all, I need not give up the thought of doing that, too, in time; because even now, talking with whoever is worthy, I can give a reason for my faith in one and another excellence, the fresh strange music, the affluent language, the exquisite pathos and true new brave thought-but in this addressing myself to you, your own self, and for the first time, my feeling rises altogether. I do, as I say, love these Books with all my heart-and I love you too: do you know I was once not very far from seeing .. really seeing you? Mr Kenyon said to me one morning “would you like to see Miss Barrett?”-then he went to announce me,-then he returned .. you were too unwell-and now it is years ago-and I feel as at some untoward passage in my travels-as if I had been close, so close, to some world’s-wonder in chapel or crypt, .. only a screen to push and I might have entered-but there was some slight .. so it now seems .. slight and just-sufficient bar to admission, and the half-opened door shut, and I went home my thousands of miles, and the sight was never to be! Well, these Poems were to be-and this true thankful joy and pride with which I feel myself.
Did you fall in love with your spouse the very first time that you laid eyes on him?
Love will find its way to you. Sometimes you search for love in all the wrong places and you get frustrated looking for love. You find someone and the relationship struggles because love did not find its way yet to you. Love is easy but not easy. If in the dating relationship it is a struggle, then is it love or just someone to pass time with. Does everyone have love at first sight? Not really because some folks have to spend a lot of time together to see if they are a good fit. Some people do find love at first sight and when they do….wow …bam…watch out…the room is electrified and their love spills on everyone around them.
Valentine’s Day can be very difficult when you have experienced the loss of your significant other.
Recently I received a message from someone that had lost their husband. She said:
“My husband died a year ago and people are expecting me to be the life and soul of the party but I still cry and grieve over him and miss him very much. In the evening I prefer to stay indoors and read a book rather than go out with friends and they are ringing less and less because I never return their calls. If only they would understand that my relationship was perfect and we were meant to be together forever so I cannot just forget him and move on as though nothing has happened. His death has finished me off.”
It is hard to move on when someone you love passes on. You feel like a piece of you has gone with them. Losing a loved one no matter who they are can be difficult. It is hard during the times of birthdays, anniversaries, and when you hear a special song or something that reminds you of them. Everyone grieves differently and they go through the five stages of death but sometimes we get stuck at one of them or something else happens that brings us right back to the beginning.
No one can tell a person how to grieve and when to let go of grieving. It is something that is so individualized. Sometimes people who have never been through the situation, may say rude things like, move on, he has been gone a year, you will meet someone new. Those are all the wrong things to say to someone, although some may mean well. Retreating to your own space to get away from the negative comments that may be upsetting in the first place, may sound like a good idea at the moment.
One thing to ask yourself is what did the two of you like to do together? This will help you understand what things you are remembering about your love. What makes him who he was that you fell in deep love with him? You may not be able to bring him back, however his memory can live on forever through something that you did together. For instance, if he loved playing with dogs and the thought about helping every stray dog that was out there, maybe a great way to keep his memory alive is to donate your time to a pet rescue where you can give love to a dog that has been abandoned by a family. You will feel fulfilled at the end of the day, because you will see that the thing that someone meant for harm, you turned around to good.
Something else that can help is going to a place of peace for you, maybe a park, the beach, walking through gardens, whatever that place is and if you pray, asking God to help you and get through this with His help. Reading a daily devotion, can also help uplift you daily. If you find that the mornings are hard when you wake up because he is not there, that is the time that you can take to read that inspirational devotion to uplift your spirits as you go through the day. If at night is the hardest, that may be the time to invest yourself in a hobby that you enjoy like dance, painting, sculpting or book clubs, depending on what you like to do. It will also help you meet new people who will not judge you because you don’t know them and they don’t know you. You are there to enjoy a hobby and nothing more so you can be yourself and just not worry that anyone knows anything about you.
Most recently I asked people what they considered the best Valentine’s Day Gifts they ever received or would like to have. The girls answers and the guys answers you think would be different , but at the end of the questions asked, they all had the same answer and that was to spend quality time with the person that they loved and to be told that they were loved. Everyone wants to feel like they are appreciated and loved by someone.
Here are ten ways to make someone feel loved:
Write a little note saying “I love you” and tape it to the bathroom mirror the night before so that when they wake up in the morning they find it
Make your significant other lunch and pack it for them and place a note in it to say “I am thinking about you.”
Make a book about all the reasons that you love your significant other and give it to them
Take a long walk around the park or in your neighborhood and pick one topic to talk about, “the day you met and how each of you felt”
Watch a romantic movie at home and afterwards sit out on the patio or porch and reminisce about the first time that you kissed and what each of you thought about.
Cook dinner together and surprise each other with a massage afterwards
Take the day off from work and surprise her with lunch at a romantic cafe and avoid the rush crowds at night then take a walk to the park and enjoy a nature walk together holding hands
Plan a weekend getaway to a cabin or bed and breakfast and just rekindle moments together
Write a love poem for your wife/husband even if does not rhyme. Write from your heart.
Get a dozen roses and on each one place a note telling her 12 things you love about her
Let’s face it, for those that are single, Valentine’s Day can be one of the loneliest and longest days of the year, especially as you lead up to the day. We have all been there at some point in our lives.
I remember early on in my dating life, getting ready for a date and buying the perfect dress and making plans with a young man to go out to dinner. I was so excited, new dress, perfect hair and a great day to go out for dinner for two at a romantic place. This was my boyfriend that I had been dating a year. My pick up time was 5pm for reservations at 6pm. I was ready on time and sat in the living room waiting with my parents for my date to arrive. As I sat there waiting 5:05pm came, 5:15pm came, I thought this is strange he is never late, he as a matter of fact was always early. I thought maybe he got stuck in traffic since he had recently moved three towns away from our house. I called and no answer. I waited and waited. My parents knew right away something was not right but they tried to remain supportive through the wait as they watched their daughter’s soon to be happy face turn to tears. Finally at 6:30pm, mom and dad said , ” I am sorry that he never came.” I was devastated.
I threw on a jacket and some boots over my dress and said I am going out for a drive. I ended up at the local arcade to just hang out and play games alone. It was pretty quite as most kids were either out on dates or just home too embarrassed to be seen without a date.
Just when I was about to leave, I saw a friend of mine we will call him “Jake” and he asked what I was doing there all dressed up (although a jean jacket and boots over a nice dress is kind of the fashion crime of the day!), I sheepishly replied that I was stood up. He looked at me and said, “let’s go hang out for a bit, you can’t be dateless on a night like this.” Everything was already packed being Valentine’s Day or too expensive for kids on a budget, so we ended up at Chuck E. Cheese (don’t laugh!). We were the only ones in the show section of the place as by this time it was almost 8:30pm at night. The manager brought us some pizza and a flower vase with a red rose in it and said you kids enjoy. We put coins in the juke box to play songs and danced to a few fun songs and a slow dance. We laughed and I felt better at not having to spend Valentine’s Day alone. My friend “Jake” turned one of the most romantic days of the year in to a friend date that I would remember and treasure forever.
“Jake” and I were friends so there was never any sparks there. A few years later he met a wonderful girl and got married right after college. As for the guy that stood me up, I found out that he had met someone else when he moved away and he started dating her at the same time as me and well the rest is history.
So on this Valentine’s Day, do not feel alone if you do not have a special someone to be with. Make it a girlfriend’s night out, or pamper yourself with a massage, pedicure, facial or a good book to read and celebrate you. Love yourself!
Valentine’s day comes around every year on February 14th and this is the day that some men cringe at. The reason they cringe is not because they are not romantic, it is because Valentine’s day has become such a pardon the expression, marketing holiday, that no sooner than December 26th is here, Valentine’s cards and items show up at the stores. It has become on the ranks of holidays next to Christmas one of the most expensive holidays there is.
The women want romance and the men would love nothing more than to provide it, but the problem is that restaurants have increased their price on eating out to an almost $150 per couple meal ( with alcohol extra) and with that, getting a gift or entertainment, the gentleman has spent at the very least $500 dollars for one day. Don’t get me wrong, I like the fancy dinner just as anyone else would, but when you think about it, you can save a bit and enjoy this very same place on a non holiday and still have romance.
Today let me take you on a virtual trip to Morroco. Yes ladies, let’s get creative. Gentlemen, don’t worry this won’t cost you an arm and a leg and you will have some money left over in your wallet. First of all if you want the beautiful romantic restaurant overlooking the water, downtown, fireworks, or anything like that, reserve that location the week before Valentine’s or after or a different month when it is not twice the price to eat there , you will enjoy it more and also you will not have as crowded a restaurant.
So let’s get in the kitchen, relax ladies and gents too, because gone is the old style that the woman is the only one in the kitchen. If you think that, you shall have to check out a couples cooking class and see for yourself. This gives couples the opportunity to bond and do some cooking together in the kitchen, that may lead to some cooking elsewhere! I will leave that to your own imagination 🙂
But getting back to the table. Setting an informal table for 2 is simple. First of all, remember it is your romantic dinner and anything you do, will be great as long as your sweetie is with you. Have fun with it. It does not have to be so formal that you do not enjoy the meal. I had the opportunity to be on the Newlywed Guru show and help her talk a little bit about the setting up of an informal dinner table. She decided that she loved the Moroccan culture and that she would set up a table using their typical style. It was fun, creative and full of color.
Watch the video below, this will give you some tips on setting up an informal table.
This was so much fun setting up. I thought about it and said what a great way to set up a romantic dinner for two. It is different, easy, and very informal. Most of all it is economical, it is not necessary to spend a lot of money because you are cooking at home. I am sure you will have leftovers that you can take the next day to work for lunch (and if you add a little love note in your spouse’s lunch bag, you will be carrying the love longer as he remembers the romance of the night before). Many of the dishes that you can prepare can be found on google for recipes from Morrocco.
And if you want to shop for some beautiful trendy Moroccan pieces to add to your home, visit this shop :
Enjoy your dinner it is a great one for Valentine’s Day if you want something exotic and fun with lots of reds and oranges for your decor.
I love your verses with all my heart, dear Miss Barrett,-and this is no off-hand complimentary letter that I shall write,-whatever else, no prompt matter-of-course recognition of your genius and there a graceful and natural end of the thing: since the day last week when I first read your poems, I quite laugh to remember how I have been turning and turning again in my mind what I should be able to tell you of their effect upon me-for in the first flush of delight I thought I would this once get out of my habit of purely passive enjoyment, when I do really enjoy, and thoroughly justify my admiration-perhaps even, as a loyal fellow-craftsman should, try and find fault and do you some little good to be proud of hereafter!-but nothing comes of it all-so into me has it gone, and part of me has it become, this great living poetry of yours, not a flower of which but took root and grew .. oh, how different that is from lying to be dried and pressed flat and prized highly and put in a book with a proper account at top and bottom, and shut up and put away .. and the book called a “Flora,” besides! After all, I need not give up the thought of doing that, too, in time; because even now, talking with whoever is worthy, I can give a reason for my faith in one and another excellence, the fresh strange music, the affluent language, the exquisite pathos and true new brave thought-but in this addressing myself to you, your own self, and for the first time, my feeling rises altogether. I do, as I say, love these Books with all my heart-and I love you too: do you know I was once not very far from seeing .. really seeing you? Mr Kenyon said to me one morning “would you like to see Miss Barrett?”-then he went to announce me,-then he returned .. you were too unwell-and now it is years ago-and I feel as at some untoward passage in my travels-as if I had been close, so close, to some world’s-wonder in chapel or crypt, .. only a screen to push and I might have entered-but there was some slight .. so it now seems .. slight and just-sufficient bar to admission, and the half-opened door shut, and I went home my thousands of miles, and the sight was never to be! Well, these Poems were to be-and this true thankful joy and pride with which I feel myself.
